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The BrandProv Blog

How to STOP telling white lies and learn something new!

November 17, 2013

 
“When we lie to save face for ourselves … we deny ourselves the opportunity to get more information.  We deny ourselves the opportunity to learn.” – Simon Sinek
 

When was the last time you caught yourself telling a “while lie” to someone?

Was it 5 days ago, 5 hours ago, 5 minutes ago?

If I’m honest … for me, it was a few hours ago when I was asked by my doorman if I had any questions about one of our buildings updated policies.

I said, “Nope I’m all good, thanks.”

Actually, I’m not good at all.

I have a million questions and I think there are some ridiculous things in it.

And I’m kinda pissed about a few of them.

But I didn’t want to get into it, cause a confrontation or look stupid.

So I lied.

And as I was in the elevator up to my apartment. I thought, “What good did that do?”

None.

Because I’m still pissed.  And maybe he could have helped me understand something better? Or referred me to someone who could?

Bottom line: I denied myself a major opportunity to learn something and get more information that could likely make me feel more comfortable.

I thought … how often are we doing this in life?   How many opportunities are we missing to learn something new because we are afraid to be humiliated?

Guess what …

It’s happening Every.Freaking.Day.

The reality is this:  The willingness to say and admit what we do not know is MONUMENTAL!!!!  It’s a game changer.

And it separates the great leaders from the average.

The worst leaders are the ones that think they have to know as much or more than everyone else. The best know that their employees know a hell of a lot more than they do.  And they express that value.

Soooo …

I have a challenge for you this week …

Tell ZERO lies for 48 hours.

ZERO.

You’ll quickly see that this is hard as hell AND realize how much you do it in a day.

Now don’t go out there and be mean. Honesty doesn’t = mean.

See what you learn.

If you find yourself in a position in which you may offend someone with the truth, then answer a different question.

For example, if you find yourself at a bad wedding and you’re asked if your enjoying it (and the wedding sucks) respond with one thing you did enjoy, “I loved watching you walk down the isle” … or … “It was so special to see you get married.”

As you rise to this challenge … be on the lookout for the 6 main ways you “lie”:

  1. To save face – Looks like:  “Sorry I’m late, there was a huge pile up on the highway.”
  2. To shift blame – Looks like:  “My assistant ever told me you called.”
  3. To avoid confrontation – Looks like: “You are doing a great job, but we can’t afford a nanny anymore.”
  4. To get your way – Looks like:  “I can’t make it in today, I’ve caught the bug that’s going around.”
  5. To Be Nice – Looks like:  “That dress looks amazing on you.”
  6. To make yourself feel better – Looks like:  “I’ll charge this stuff now and will pay it off as soon as I get my bonus.”

When was the last time you told a “white lie” that denied you the opportunity to learn something new?

Be well.  Be Inspired!!
Judi
 
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